Life Takes Over

My goal of blogging every day has already been tossed to the side...my life got in the way. I started back at school this week. Teacher meetings, trainings, getting the classrooms ready. My stress level has shot through the roof. I thought I was prepared, but guess again. Work has already started to take on a life of its own, a life that has, in the past, made me sicker than I already was. The pressure to be a "model" pe teacher, to be a great coach, to be creative, and to be willing to put in those extra hours and go way above & beyond the call of duty. And then, feeling like a failure because I felt I didn't succeed at any of those things.
So now, a new school year, a healthier state of being...what's going to change? I've already felt myself being crunched, administration wanting to know what programs I'm going to run, trying to make sure my schedule is full of the extracurriculars that I'm apparently now in charge of. I panicked, wondering how I was going to do all of it and still take care of myself, get myself to therapy. I did a most wonderous thing...I set boundaries. I said I would run programs 2 days per week. Every once in a while, there may be a 3rd day, but I can work with that. It was so awkward to actually say "this is what I can do, this is what I can't do." My "please don't be mad at me" button was being pushed repeatedly during the entire meeting. But I did it.
Life...now is much better than it was. I can say no (with a bit more confidence), I can actually have a real LIFE. I played softball tonite and then went to dinner with a guy I just happen to have a little bit of a crush on...all these things would never have happened if I was still in my little eating disordered world.
Life takes over, but if you handle it the right way, it doesn't have to suffocate you.